ZOMBIES!

                 After a long day at work, I can finally type this one up. I finally finished my zombie watch list and decided it would be best to make two separate lists. One list for zombie films, and the other for the zomcom ( zombie comedy). Before I begin the task of making these lists, I would like to make something very clear. The movies that make up The Evil Dead trilogy, why amazingly awesome, are not zombie movies. The Evil Dead movies are about demons and demon possessions. Sure, dead bodies are re-animated, but they torment Ash and are purely the embodiment of the demon. Zombies do not have goals beyond the basic need to feed. Now that we've got that out of the way.....

               Zombie Films

10) Resident Evil: Apocalypse

                    What's better than Jill Valentine running around in a tube top and short shorts killing zombies? That would be a Milla Jovovich nip slip. And yes, this movies does have both.

9) Cabin Fever 2: Spring Fever

                    Cabin Fever 2 is campy, gory, and all around awesome. I can't think of a better way to spend a Friday night than watching this combo on a big ass tv.

8) Dawn of the Dead (2004)

                      I know I'm going to catch some hate for saying this, but I liked the 2004 re-make more that the original George A. Romero movie of the same name. Pregnant zombies giving birth to zombie babies just hits home for me. This movie may also be the reason I can't bring my self to watch Modern Family ( I just really hate that guy.).

7) 28 Weeks Later

                     Earlier this week, I sat through both 28 Days Later and 28 Weeks Later. I didn't really care for the first one. However, I really liked the second one. Maybe it's the society making it, then being destroyed violently in a mess of confusion that got to me, I couldn't get enough of it.

6) Deadgirl

                     Deadgirl was just wrong. The movie starts with two friends spelunking in an old nut house. After being chased by the guard dog in the facility ( Who the hell keeps it fed?), the boys come across what they believe to be a kidnapped woman who is naked and tied down to a table. After discovering that she cant speak, they come to the conclusion that she must just be crazy. At this point, one boy wants to help her, and the other thinks it would be fun to put his penis in her..... yea..... I'm really not sure whats worse, raping a zombie, or raping a zombie while thinking shes just a crazy chick that was locked up and forgotten about in a basement. Just a heads up, this one has a whole lot of nudity and you will probably want to vom.

5) I am Legend (2007)

                     While I  have yet to see the original, I have seen Will Smith's re-make several time. Throughout the movie, you start to feel bad for Smith and become aware that he is batshit crazy. Screaming at manikins, you realize that his only friend is his dog. And then the movie goes all Marley and Me. I tend to turn the movie off at that scene.

4) Dead Snow

                     I bought Call of Duty Black Ops for the same reason I watched this movie. Nazi zombies are just badass.  However, listening to a  group of people cry out in Norwegian get very old very fast. At least Swedish sounds close enough to English that you can understand without reading the subtitles.

3) The Crazies (2010)

                    Yet another case where I like the re-make more than the original ( I know a few people that are going to hate me for this). I first watched this movie without knowing it was a zombie movie. Netflix realised that I think the dude from Justified (Timothy Olyphant) is awesomesauce. After watching, I realised that he is way more badass than I had previously thought and is incredibly under rated. I also liked the idea of zombies seeming like people that truly don't give a shit anymore.

2) Quarantine 2: Terminal

                   For any horror fans reading this, don't judge me. Personally, I like the Quarantine movies and I don't get why they are so hated. A terrorist organization making a zombie plague and releasing across the world and only having enough anti-viruses for themselves is great, especial after the " ruh roh" moment of realising that the anti-virus doesn't work. And if that doesn't get you sucked in, a chick gets her mouth eaten in the beginning. Sick!

1) Land of the Dead

                     Should Land of the Dead have the number one spot on this list? Who can say? I thought this movie was the best one Romero did. This one was so good that the video game company Bioware payed homage to it with Tennpenny Tower in its high profile game Fallout 3. I have known for quite some time that when the zombies attack I want someone like Patrick Jane from the Mentalist on my team. Now i think I just want Simon Baker there so he could just "badass" everything to death.

                   I hope it was worth it. After watching 37 zombie movies in 1 week I have finally completed my list. Even if you guys don't like it, I'm pretty sure when Z.A. (Zombie Apocalypse) happens, I might just live a little longer than everyone else. After all, surviving the zombie apocalypse isn't about killing the most zombies, it's about surviving. Since I have off tomorrow, I'm sure I'll be able to get the zomcom list typed up and posted tomorrow. Have a great night/day, everyone. And good luck during Z.A.

Zombie Survival Tip #4: If there is only one zombie in your way and sneaking is not an option, do NOT fire a gun. That just attracts a hoard. Hoards are no bueno.